On February 28, 2002 Jean Kilbourne was a guest on The Oprah Winfrey Show. The topic was teen dating violence. Jean discussed the influence of violent sexual imagery in the media on relationships between young men and women. Viewer response to Jean's message was immediate, positive and hopeful. Read your comments below.

Many of you asked what you could do to change the media environment within which we must raise our children. You will find many helpful organizations listed in Jean's Resources for Change Guide. Also check out the Get Active! page, which lists upcoming events and campaigns that need your spirit and commitment.

Portions of the emails have been edited to protect the identity of the sender. To send Jean email, write to JKilbourne@aol.com. And thanks for your support!

I saw the Oprah show this afternoon and was so pleased to hear that there is clear evidence linking advertising and abuse toward women. I am ABSOLUTELY AMAZED also, like Oprah said, that we as a society do not see so clearly this connection - it's so very obvious. But, I suppose this is just another manifestation of the level of denial we live with in this country.

My question is what would be the best way for me to have any influence on change in this area? How can we (I) begin to get the message consistently across about the devastating effects of the constant bombardment of these sexual and violent images on our teens, and how it is killing them? What I feel like doing is going to the top of the Capitol steps and screaming at the very top of my lungs, but I know this won't work, and I'll just end up with a sore throat and probably in jail. Please give me a suggestion.

Peggy

Jean,

I know you don't remember me but I saw you on the Oprah show today and I just couldn't believe it. In 1985, I was a student [in New Jersey]. I was the President of the Residence Hall Association at the time. We sponsored an annual Alcohol Awareness Week. You were a guest lecturer. My friend (David) and I picked you up at the airport. After the lecture my other friend (Lisa) and I took you back to your hotel. It was dark, muddy, and we made a wrong turn. We tried to turn around and got Lisa's car stuck in the mud. We didn't have enough money for a tow truck. Than God you were there! I'm not sure what we would have done. I tell that story quite often. I can laugh now but it wasn't very funny then. If I remember correctly, you knew Bub [...]. He was supposed to send you money for the tow truck. You have been very successful. Congratulations. I hope you remember that experience [...].

Susan

Dear Dr. Kilbourne,

I saw you on the Oprah Winfrey show today speaking about violence in the media and it's influence on teenagers. I would very much like to know if you have any video presentations on this topic that are available to the public. I am a Psychotherapist who works with both victims and perpetrators of violence...in all formats. In particular, I wish to find a video that I could show to my juvenile male sexual offender groups, and my female juvenile victims of domestic violence/sexual assault groups. I have created a unit on "violence in the media", pulling information from books, music CD's & videos, and advertisements, and have used presented this information in these groups for a few years now...but, I have not had access to any audio-video material that speak to the violence that is epidemic on the cd's, videos, movies, magazine ads, and television. I feel an informative video would be a wonderful supplement to the program that I already present in these groups. I am trying to record the Oprah Winfrey show, which aired today 02/28/02 because it speaks to both audiences, the victim, and the perpetrator. Unfortunately, Oprah only has transcripts available, and not videos. I strongly feel that one way to combat the ever presence of the negative and violent subliminal messages that teens (and U.S. society in general) receive on a daily basis, is to present awareness through the same source... a video on the topic of awareness of these messages would be an excellent beginning! If you have any videos available, or know where I might access some videos or music on this topic, would you please forward it to me at [...]? I appreciate the work you are doing, and I wish to continue to network with others, like myself, who see this problem as a very serious one that needs attending. When you get a moment, please respond to this email. Thanks in advance. Kindest Regards,

Suellen

Hi!
My name is Jean [...]. I just saw you on the Oprah show. I have been very interested for years in media effects on women. When I can, I write, e-mail, phone companies, advertisers, program sponsors etc., regarding offensive, exploitative material. I am always wanting to be more involved yet don't know where to direct my interest. Do you have any suggestions? Also, will you be coming to Columbus, Ohio to lecture soon? Thank you,

Jean
Columbus, Ohio

Hi Jean;
My name is Michelle [...]. I am nineteen years old and a sophomore at Fordham University in New York. I just watched your segment on the Oprah show. I feel very strongly about violence and sex on tv and especially in video games. I'm not sure if you have heard of a new video game for Sony Playstation 2, it's called Grand Theft Auto. Now I do not own a video game system, however, I am an assistant teacher and one of my second graders explained the game to me. It involves stealing cars, killing police officers, and picking up prostitutes. The child told me that you take a prostitute and bring her to an ally and watch the car bounce up and down. What is most disturbing about this game is that the child told me it came free with the sony playstation system. Something needs to be done!! If you know of any organizations that I can join against this outrage, PLEASE let me know. I am a college student and do not have money to give, but I have my time, and I would love to use it for a positive benefit for something I feel so strongly about. Thank You,

Michelle

I just wanted to tell you that you did a great job on Oprah yesterday. To be honest, the first half of the show had me cringing in places (I felt like there was too much blaming the victim going on), and, once you came on, I felt like I could relax. I really thought you did a wonderful job of getting your ideas across in the short amount of time you had, and, as usual, you were gracious and compassionate. (I appreciated your response to the mother who spoke after the commercial break. You really helped shift the focus to the cultural context and messages.) It was pretty ironic, though -- during a commercial break, they showed a commercial for the new Jodi Foster movie (which does look good, but very violent), and then they switched back to you talking about the commercial messages and violence... i wonder if the producers see those contradictions. . . I am sure you taped it (if you didn't, we did), but they also showed the Herbal Essences Orgasm commercial. . .

Anyhow, I just wanted to tell you that it was really important to have your voice on the show -- I'm sure you planted some seeds. So, once again, thank you for your work. Take care,

Kendra

Ms. Kilbourne,

As a former marketing professional and college instructor, I would like to know how I can get involved in supporting your research and cause. I have an MBA, experience in psychology and graphic design, and experience in sexism. I have time available to work/volunteer. My interest is the culture created by the media and its adverse effects on the well-being and self-esteem of consumers. I feel very strongly about this issue and would be more than willing to do research, gather data, write,etc. My limitation is that I am uncomfortable working with large groups of people. My strength is that I am open and can listen. How can I help? Sincerely,

Joyce [...]
St. Louis, MO

I saw you today on the Oprah Show. I have three daughters and I felt like I tried everything I could during their teen years to educate myself and to educate them about relationships. I did everything I knew how to do to keep the lines of communication open and really worked hard at being a parent. In the midst of it all I felt that I was losing and it has taken me too many years to finally realize that the forces against my girls and my family were so powerful and numerous. I appreciate so much the comments that you made today in support of parents.

I would also be very interested in what I can do to make my voice heard regarding the ways that women are portrayed in the media. I am so angry about it! I feel I must speak out! I must do something!

Again, I thank you for the work you are doing.

Sincerely,
Maryle [...]
Hermitage, TN